(Intermediate) Lessons Learned

Wow, it feels like I never left. There's no comfort like home. I've seen a couple of friends so far and it feels like I just saw them last week, not five months ago. Strange, after all that's happened in California, how time seems to have mended itself at the seam.

At the same time, though, I feel for the first time a seprateness from my family. I feel more like myself rather than the same Joseph everyone here has always known--the quiet, unobtrusive person everyone's come to know and expect. Maybe I can surprise a few people while I'm here.

I'm realizing now that in the last five months, I've grown more into my own skin. It's been a hell of a process, and it ain't over yet, but I'm getting there. With or without a partner, with or without others' support, I'm getting there. I definitely feel more comfortable with myself than I did in July.

As for the rest of my time here, I plan to do as much of nothing as I can while getting in touch with all my people. Did I mention it's good to be home? I also plan to eat like there's no tomorrow--after I get over this cold. I got sick my second day here. Go figure... It's kicking my ass, but I will not let it keep me from having a good time in Austin.

Some things I've learned in California:

• I WILL survive
• people will disappoint you, no matter who they are
• I am worthy of attention and all the praise anyone wants to give
• there is no one person for anyone, but there are lots of good candidates willing to try
• I'm not as awkward-looking as I thought
• I'm not wrong for the way I feel
• my opinion matters and I should speak it
• it's time to start living

Who would've thought my stubborn ass would learn something?

--Joseph